CATHERINE, sitting in front of her computer: Okay Darq the photo shoot is done and I’m posting a picture of your new Easter shoes.
DARQ: And you’ll tell people to stop back on Easter for the reveal of my Easter outfit?
CATHERINE: Of course. And I’m telling them the Easter Bunny will be bringing you an Easter basket, that is, provided you give up the idea of hunting the Easter bunny and roasting him for our dinner.
DARQ: Rabbits are game. And game is game. I find your customs bizarre.
CATHERINE: You’re entitled to your opinion. Just remember what I said–you can hunt the wild rabbits on the farm, roast them, stew them, whatever, but you CANNOT HUNT THE WHITE EASTER BUNNY!
DARQ: There’s no difference between rabbits and bunnies. I checked. They look alike.
CATHERINE: They do not. The Easter Bunny is white. He’s special. He brings Easter baskets filled with Easter eggs, chocolate, and treats to households on Easter morning.
DARQ: Are you implying he’s like the gift-giving Santa Clause who gave me a fishing pole and net at Christmas?
CATHERINE: Sort of. The Easter basket and Easter eggs are gifts, but the Easter Bunny doesn’t go down chimney’s. His mode of transport is a magical network of rabbit holes. One other thing the Easter Bunny has over Santa is that the Easter Bunny poops colorful jelly beans that we get to eat.
DARQ, whose face scrunches up with distaste: EWWWWWWWW!!! Eating poop? That’s gross.
CATHERINE: Actually jelly beans are sweet treats. I like them. All except the black ones–they’re liquorice. I don’t like liquorice.
DARQ, departing the computer room: Ewwwww!!!
CATHERINE, thinking to herself: If the Easter Bunny finds out Darq wants to hunt him and cook him, will the Easter Bunny even stop at my house?
COME BACK EASTER MORNING AND FIND OUT!
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